Do You Know Who You Are Or Just Think You Do?

How do you describe yourself? What words come to your mind when you hear that question? Alphabetical listings of  adjectives rush to your rescue as you discover it isn’t as easy as it might seem. Could it be knowing who you are is one of those things in your life that gets taken for granted? Let’s see where this goes.

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Describing who you are and what you do seem to get tangled up for most. There is quite a difference when taken into account what you do for a vocation or career, don’t tell the whole story. Working as an accountant, being an ace with numbers, may describe what you do but doesn’t mention the fact that you are a raving conservative. Maybe a contrast of words but there it is.

Seemingly a recluse at home is the hot shot salesman. Gambling at Las Vegas as an invited guest is the ordinary housewife, risking hundreds of thousands with little to back it up. Who is she? Housewife or gambler? Where might addict or deeply disturbed and dysfunctional fit in?

Tremendous amounts of time and money are spent in the effort to keep who we are well hidden for the most part, while creating this other persona we display on the outside for all to see as the “real” us. Notice the inclusive “us” as there is no hiding the fact as part of the human race “I” must include self.

The only difference is a lifetime has been spent in search of the who and what. Enough issues in younger years surfaced to the degree that facts could hardly be ignored as to not being normal. While others may have just acquiesced to thinking to the contrary in their lives, others were just not satisfied accepting things at face value. After all, were we not part of the “hippie” generation, where authority was questioned along with anything else that seemed to be too controlling?

Certain aspects of this search for the “who” could nearly be classified as obsessive, but only nearly. The testing that has been voluntarily taken, seeming scores of personality and temperament evaluations, page upon page of definitions of who I am that seem more like some strange person I didn’t know.

Swallowed up in all this was the inkling of truth, that this was really me and I had been ignoring all the signs for decades. Now truth was having it’s day but not without resistance. Whoever is the author of “truth will set you free,” conveniently left off that it would be painful in the process.

Now, where does all that leave you? I’m sharing a little of my “who” to give some insight as to how you may be hiding from yours. About this point is where that river so often referred to begins to flow, known as “denial.”

Leading readers exactly where? Why would you want to go down this path to dig in some areas that have been nicely ignored for decades, thank you very much? Other than the fact it is immensely freeing to stop the hiding of the real self, out of fear and possible rejection, it may be difficult to give a genuine reason.

It’s another example of how we have been conditioned all our lives that the “real you” isn’t quite up to par. Look no further than the nearest T.V. to get that message, or the latest photos of those we are led to believe lead lives we hunger and thirst for, seen everywhere on the Internet.

Constant dissatisfaction bombardment may become a new neurosis for the psychiatric shamans to probe into those dark recesses of your overstimulated thought centers.

So consider pausing for a second to go back in your memory, electing a moment in time where life was an absolute “bowl of cherries!” We’ve all had them. Shooting that hole-in-one at the local putt-putt golf course that won the prize. Unforgettable dining at that 5 star restaurant where you experienced food and service like a king or queen.

Dazzling sunsets of that vacation that could not find enough colors in the palette for description, where Piña Coladas were abundant and the beaches truly tropical. Moving into the house of your dreams, pinching yourself to make sure it is not of your imagination, but real.

Now close your eyes, and see all of that event in it’s splendor. Feel it, listen to any voice that may be audible, aromas, the wind, tastes, experience the remembrance of all there is from that moment. Make certain you are looking through your eyes at this event, and not as though you were standing off to the side observing yourself. This is important.

After you have seen yourself in this memory, at the very height of your feelings, open your eyes. Touch your thumb to the second joint on the middle finger of your right hand. That may sound silly, but in doing so you create what is known as an anchor.

This is just one example of how you can take a moment where you may be feeling down, and simply by touching that joint as indicated it will bring back a moment when all was right with the world, helping to replace those less than positive feelings.

Repeat the process several times to make it strong. Then recall it the next day and see if you notice an uplifting sensation. You can also do the same for other moments of similar significance. Point is this is just one of many exercises to retrain your subconscious that controls 95 percent of all your activities.

What does this have to do with knowing who you are? Consider what it means to have 95 percent of your daily activity controlled by your subconscious mind, and then ask yourself if you know who you are! Who’s in control?

You have the power to change many things in your world, but not until you learn how to reprogram your subconscious. Many have tried without having the real understanding of how it’s done. You’ve done the drill, if New Year’s Resolutions come to mind. That’s a small example, but it’s real.

There will be more on this. Feel free to comment on your thoughts. I think I’ll see about reclaiming that slim physique of my younger years!

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Alan Written by:

Alan is retired and resides in Quito, Ecuador. Writing is a passion which has resulted in two eBooks thus far, with more in the works. Married 47 years with four sons and 13 grandchildren, provides potential grist for the mill! Alan is a charter “Boomer”, a Viet Nam veteran, committed to roasting his own coffee and writes about whatever pops into his mind. He loves to build and ride recumbent bikes, play racquetball, writes almost daily, travels Ecuador, and talks to anything that does not move fast enough! The twinkle in his eye is a combination of the sun, and an active sense of humor.

His desire to encourage others to write is being answered through his articles on the Internet.